Monthly Archives: June 2012

True life: I had a man get down on his knees yesterday to beg me for my number.

Yes, I caved and gave it to him. He was on his knees. No, I haven’t decided whether I’ll pick up if/when he calls. Entertainment potential seems high, but he also seems excessively clingy…

Advertisements

Is it just me, or is this being an adult thing easier than expected?

Granted, I’ve been at it for a grand total of four days now, so everything I have to say should be taken with a grain of salt, but hear me out. So buying everything for my move? Between thrift stores, Ross, and Marshall’s, #MayatheBargainHunter had no problems. My mother, grandmother, and uncle graciously helped me with the actual moving, and in four years of dorm rooms, I’ve become a pro at unpacking and decorating in a day or so. My mom and grandma also took me on an initial grocery run and trip to Target to buy, among other things, an ironing board, because that would have been awkward to take on the metro. But then on Saturday afternoon around 4:30, they got on the road and here I was, alone in my new house in DC, establishing myself as an independent young woman and shit. 

…And everything was fine. I cleaned the kitchen and then went upstairs to continue unpacking. I found out that my housemate wasn’t coming home that night and didn’t freak out about it (much). I went to sleep at a reasonable bedtime. The next day, I woke up at 7:48 and went on a three-and-a-half hour cleaning spree. It involved stainless steel cleaner, window cleaner, Fantastic all-purpose cleaner, scrubbing floors with Swiffer Wet Mop pads because the Swiffer part was nowhere to be found, Lysol bathroom cleaner, Mr. Clean Toilet Bowl Cleaner, a broom and a dustpan, and nearly an entire roll of paper towels. My landlord came over later that day and the first words out of his mouth were, “Whoa! Extreme home makeover! You’re a welcome addition to the house already.” I made pasta and meat sauce that night for dinner, with enough leftover to take for lunch on my first day of work. I picked out my outfit for my first day and went to sleep at a reasonable hour. 

The next day I got up at 7:30, showered, ironed my clothes, professionalized my hair, made breakfast, packed my lunch, and walked to work. I did not get lost. I did say hello to people as I walked down the street. A nontrivial percentage of them ignored me or looked at me as if I should be institutionalized. I did not worry about it. I got to work exactly at 9:00, met my supervisor, and had a generally amazing first day. I think I’m going to thoroughly and completely love my job. AND I think I’ll be good at it. And that’s a great thing to be able to say about a well-paying good-benefit-giving right-out-of-college job. Hell, it’s a great thing to be able to say about any job at any point in one’s life. 

Today was my second day of work and I’ve already been heavily praised for my performance. I’ve started doing some actual work instead of just orientation-y things, and I still really like it. I didn’t realize how much I was deeply craving a way to apply sociology to actually helping people and influencing things until I joined this company where we do that every. single. day. And today I may only have been helping in the smallest of ways (calling Quality Directors at hospitals for this project we’ve been contracted to that’s aimed at reducing inpatient harm and hospital readmissions), but I saw direct results and was just like, FUCK YEAH I LOVE WHAT I DO. And I came home and made a burger for dinner and then realized I didn’t have any ketchup, so I went to the store and got some. 
Then I came upstairs and was like, oh, the 4th of July is next week. This is another one of those holidays that stores like to commercialize on to have entirely unrelated sales on big things like mattresses and TVs. I should check Sleepys to see if my bed is on sale. Not only is it on sale, but there’s free shipping on online purchases over $599.99 during some 36 hour window that right now is part of. I searched online for a coupon code that saved me ten percent, bringing my order total to $601.97 for a full sized headboard, footboard, mattress, boxspring, and bed frame. #winning

tl;dr version: Goodbye strugglebus, hello awesome adult life. 

“As a woman, I feel continually shhh’ed. Too sensitive. Too mushy. Too wishy washy. Blah blah. Don’t let someone steal your tenderness. Don’t allow the coldness and fear of others to tarnish your perfectly vulnerable beating heart. Nothing is more powerful than allowing yourself to truly be affected by things. Whether it’s a song, a stranger, a mountain, a rain drop, a tea kettle, an article, a sentence, a footstep…feel it all – look around you- all of this is for you. Take it and have gratitude. Give it and feel love.”

–Amelia Olson

Pushing the reset button.

We’re fast approaching the last 36 hours or so before I load up the car and truck and make the trek down to DC. I’m moving out of my mother’s house. Like, for real this time, not like going away to college I’ll-se-you-when-I’m-on-break-in-six-weeks leaving, but rather I-just-signed-a-13-month-lease here’s-my-new-address moving out. 

And it’s funny because when I was fake-moving-out to go to Princeton, I did a crazy overall life reset. I had come to terms with the fact that I didn’t really want to keep being the person I was, and actively underwent a major overhaul trying to redress and redefine myself. My entire mindset was new place, new friends, new me. And even though I didn’t stick with the self I’d created for Princeton for very long, rather opting to develop into the person Princeton made me, I definitely learned the value of taking a moment out for self-reflection immediately before a major life change, and the opportunity to personal development new places, faces, experiences, and challenges offer us. 

Four years ago, when I was getting ready to move, I was so excited for everything to change. I wanted to become everything I didn’t think my hometown could make or let me be. The entirety of my immediate future was one big Wonderball of opportunity that I couldn’t wait to take advantage of. 

And now I’m tempted to say that I’m moving, but I don’t want anything to change. That’s hyperbole, but I feel so much closer to the other end of the spectrum. It’s like, I’m moving and everything is changing and there’s not much I can do about it. But…come to think of it, that’s not really the truth either. 

I am absolutely not looking for a personality overhaul like I was last time. I’m not looking to redefine myself. I happen to think I’m pretty damn fabulous. In all honesty, I adore the person these past four years have made me, and I’m not finna let her go. I want to maintain her, and I plan to do this by maintaining the types of activities and relationships that made her, both specifically and generally. I can’t say that I’m going to stay in such regular communication with (all of) my friends from college that catch-up sessions won’t be necessary, but I demand that such sessions be many and frequent. I’m going to keep blogging and keep following all the blogs I follow. I’ve joined a bunch of meetup groups and am searching for like-minded folks with whom to have discussions of the Large Library (read: late night college) variety. I’m going to read again. 

But there have to be things about the college lifestyle that I don’t particularly want to hold onto in this new chapter of my life. Let us count the things:

  1. I don’t want to only actively maintain those friendships which are logistically convenient. In fact, I refuse to.
  2. I don’t want to be tired all the time. There is no reason to be consistently running on empty anymore. When I hit that first wave of tired at night, I should go to sleep. There’s no reason to pretend I’m not tired. End of story.
  3. I refuse to be off balance. No part of my life deserves to be dominating everything else. 
  4. I want to read for pleasure. I want to do absolutely nothing sometimes without feeling bad about it. I want to watch TV. I want to take back my free time. 
  5. I want to eat better. And drink more water. I did that well last summer, by simply not buying drinks so that I drank a lot of water. 
  6. I want to exercise regularly. I’ve already decided that I’m going to walk to/from work, because it’s less than a mile each way, but there’s a gym in my office building and I want to start using it. Maybe after work two or three days a week?
  7. I want the majority of my free time at least one day a week to not be spent in front of my computer. I want to go out into the world and DO things. And I want to not be scared to do them by myself. I got over that in Chi-town and I want to do it again. 
  8. And I need to at least seriously think about drinking, partying, hooking up, and how my rules about these things need to adapt to life in the real world. Not sure exactly how they should change yet–I might need to experience real world partying before I can make plans/rules for how to navigate it. 

Seems like life is full of a million possible reset buttons, some bigger than other.